Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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