I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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