So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
cat food counts as protein by the way
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
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