I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
