this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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