so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
