Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
