You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
