Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
i believe in u and ur pee
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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