mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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