hotel room ftw
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
