yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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