Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Randomize
