Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
