i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
