i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
