you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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