i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
