Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
