so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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