ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
