You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
