woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
