his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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