Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
