What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
