I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
