Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
