He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
