Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I checked into jail on foursquare
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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