Me. At least after what I've been through.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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