Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
