somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
