Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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