bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
