Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
