Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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