I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
