dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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