Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm at about main and main street
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
