you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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