..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
