Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Then you guys just all showered together...?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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