I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
