You don't have asthma, your pregnant
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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