I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Do you still have your period?
I just saw a hot homeless man
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize