So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
