So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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