the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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