Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
